Lu | they/them | asexual, aromantic, greygender
This footage was recorded in March 2016.
When you’re a kid, there are some questions you’re always asked. What do you want to be when you grow up? Or, what special power would you have if you could have any special power ever? And I used to have two answers. One: I wanted to be able to read people’s minds. Which, I realised, would actually be quite uncomfortable. My other one: invisibility. For birthdays and Christmases I’d asked for Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak so that if ever I was feeling anxious or afraid I could put on this cloak and I wouldn’t exist any more. Nobody could see me. I always wanted to hide. But I also thought it would be cool to sneak up on people and make them jump and suddenly appear or just to move things in mid-air so someone would be drinking coffee and suddenly the spoon would walk across the table.
Unfortunately, my dream came true, and I got invisibility. Because nobody understands asexuality. And that is how I identify. And that makes me invisible.
Recently there was an election for Lib Reps at my university and one of my friends was running for LGBTQ+ Lib Rep. And the person running opposite her ran for LGBT Lib Rep. The name of the role has a Q in it. The name of our society has Q+ in it. And there was this person trying to take the role who had ignored the Q, who hadn’t even considered a +. He was standing for lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans people. And none of those cover me, in any shape or form. I am asexual, aromantic, and greygender, and those are encapsulated in the Q and the + of the acronym.
By people saying “A is for ally”, or people ignoring us completely, you are giving us that invisibility cloak. You are letting us sit and hide. And sometimes it really is true that “be careful of what you wish for”. Because I wished for invisibility and growing up and coming out to myself and then to others, that is exactly what I have got. I’ve got invisibility. And it’s not what I’d hoped it would be.