There are so many terms in the LGBTQ+ community. So many different words to define and understand in order to get an idea of how someone identifies. Why can’t we cut it down? Why can’t we get rid of the terms that are too similar to other terms?

Because everyone is different, and doesn’t fit into boxes.

In coming to terms with who I am, I tried on so many different labels. It was like trying on shoes: some were too loose or pinched my skin, some rubbed and left blisters, and some fit in ways I was not used to. But like most people my feet are different sizes, and I wanted to wear different shoes for different occasions.

Eventually I settled on the term greygender. I class myself as non-binary, and, in rare occasions, as trans. But really I found another term that fit me better. One that I coined, but that I don’t feel the need to add to a list of identities. That term was chromagender.

Below is a visualisation of how this feels for me. Gender, and my gender especially, is a spectrum. I can feel green, or purple, or yellow. Sometimes feeling red means I want to wear dresses and lipstick, but also bind my chest. Feeling grey often implies I’ll wear jeans and a graphic t-shirt. Colour is not a pink/blue divide. Society’s expectation of gender expression is not something I think about. It’s just how I feel comfortable day-by-day.

A grid of 24 colours placed randomly and including shades of yellow, green, grey, blue, red and purple.

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